After the loss of my husband, it took quite a while to work up the courage to get out into the world again. Dating is a scary prospect if your last date was 40 years or so ago. My first date didn’t go very well. I nearly destroyed a nice fancy restaurant. My Second First Date was even more disastrous because my ‘date’ had a heart attack and died. I’m sure everyone has had a bad date or two but DEATH is definitely a bad date with a capital B
I decided though, that perhaps the third time would be the charm and signed back into Match.com. Discouragement was looming on the horizon and I was ready to give up. A trip had been planned to visit my children in Michigan and my paid membership to the site was about to expire. The decision wasn’t difficult. I would let my membership expire. If it was meant to be, I would meet someone. Otherwise, forget it. I’d just get old (well, OLDER is probably the better word) alone.
Then I spotted him. He had a nice smile. His name was Richard, but he liked to be called Dick, Just Plain Dick. He even signed his notes J.P.D. I read through his profile and we shared quite a few likes and dislikes. I thought, ‘Why not give it one more shot?” I sent him a ‘wink’ just to see if he might be interested. He was and we started emailing back and forth.
I left on my trip to Michigan without having met him face to face. I was away for about a month and Dick and I continued to email back and forth. The more I heard from him the more I found to like about him.
By the time we finally arranged that face-to-face meeting. We each felt like we knew the other. We were comfortable with each other. We talked and talked and talked. I met his family. He met my family. Things were going very well.
Then one evening I became afraid that perhaps the third time would not be the charm. I became afraid that perhaps I was jinxed and would spend the remainder of my days alone after all.
The evening started normally. We were going to a Mexican restaurant with another couple. The restaurant was just down the street from where I live so everyone met at my place. We chatted and laughed until the hunger pains reminded us that we needed to go to dinner. The restaurant was busy but there was a table by the window and the four of us began studying the menu.
Once our order was placed and we were waiting for our food, Dick turned to me and said he didn’t feel very well. When I looked at him, he was as white as a ghost with a sheen of cold perspiration shinning on his face. Swallowing the thought of another DEATH DATE, I suggested that we go to the emergency room. But, of course, being a typical stubborn male, he said that wasn’t necessary and he probably just needed something to eat.
By the time our food was served, Dick was looking and feeling worse. He said he’d like to go out to the car and lay down for a few minutes. He was dizzy and light headed. Once he was out of hearing range, I asked the other couple if they thought we should be going to the E.R. They agreed that was exactly where Dick should be right now.
We asked for our food to be boxed up and hurried out to the car. Half expecting to find Dick unconscious, I slowly opened the car door and peered in. Amazingly to me anyway, he was still alive. The three of us told him that we’d decided he needed to be at the hospital and that we would be headed there as soon as the car was put into gear.
Dick would hear none of it. He insisted that if he could just lay down comfortably for a while, he’d be alright. “Just take me to Donna’s” he said. “We’re practically in her back yard. I can lay down there.”
In my mind, I was screaming, “No, no, no, don’t take him to my house. No, no, that’s not good. I don’t like this. I don’t like this at all.” But aloud all I said was, “I really think the hospital is the best idea.”
“No,” Dick insisted, “Your house is closer. All I want to do is lay down. I’ll be fine.” “Steve, ” he addressed our friend who was driving,” take me to Donna’s”
Now I was starting to break out in my own cold clammy perspiration. This can’t be happening! Am I jinxed or what? When we arrived, I asked the other couple to come on in. However, they declined. They didn’t want to be in the way. (They didn’t want to be in the way of what? The gurney that bound to arrive here within the hour?) I was near tears as I watched them drive away. These are all new friends. Friends that don’t know about the DEATH DATE. Friends that have no idea about the danger that Dick is about to step into.
Worrying and fretting, we walked into my home and Dick went straight into the bedroom and lay down. I stood there in the middle of the living room wondering if I should just go ahead and dial 911. Instead, I tip-toed in to check on him. He was already fast asleep and breathing evenly. Was the color coming back to his face? No, actually, it wasn’t. I just wanted it to really, really badly.
Every fifteen minutes I made that short trek into the bedroom and watch quietly for the rise and fall of his chest, knowing that as long as he was breathing, everything was ok. Dick slept for a couple of hours. The longest two hours I could remember enduring.
When he woke, he felt fine. He looked good. He mentioned that he’d started some new blood pressure medication and probably had just had a reaction to it. I told him that he had scared me half to death and the next time he would not be sleeping in my bedroom, he’d be in the emergency room where he belonged. He was very surprised at my agitation so I fessed up and told him about the last date who hadn’t felt well in my home.
That was 13 years ago. I’m happy to tell you that Dick is still alive and well. He proved to me that the third time truly is the charm. He has brought laughter and happiness to my days. We look forward to traveling through our sunset years together. Plus, as an added bonus, no more of that difficult disastrous dating for either of us!
Am I The Only One 